Breaking up with your girlfriend is a lengthy ordeal most of the time. There are possessions to return, friendships broken and many other time and emotionally consuming things that happen in the wake of a relationship.
A few days in, you’ve realized you’ve made a mistake. You never wanted to break up with your girlfriend in the first place and overreacted. You want your boyfriend back and it doesn’t matter whether he leaves all the cupboard doors open even though you tell him not to, right?
People often rush on to getting their ex back without thinking whether they are making a good decision or not. Much like a military commander would never send his troops on a suicide mission, it makes sense for you to take some time and think about the situation you are now in. It’s possible to get your ex back, but it is up to you to put in the leg work. Your ex will be mad at you and wish that you would stop talking and communicating with them until they get themselves back together, to a decent frame of mind again.
Whilst this might seem contrary to getting your ex back quickly, you are going to let this happen. Don’t communicate with your ex any more than they wish to talk to you and certainly don’t start the communications with them. If you are annoying and pestering your ex with half thought out messages to get back together with them, what are the chances of them accepting you ‘apology’ and actually getting back with you?
If they have any shred of self esteem left, the answer will be no, every single time.
So how do you get your ex back then?
On a more serious note though, you can always just write the number and other contact details down on a slip of paper and keep it in a safe, yet difficult to get to place. There are many Internet services that will send you an E-mail with something you write down in a pre determined time frame, say a month or so. Getting your ex back requires quite a bit of times for the hormones in your body to adjust to the loss. Humans don’t really like chance and actively fight against the loss of the love that you had. This means your heart will be guiding your actions more than your brain and this is exactly the opposite of what we want to happen.
If you don’t stop the communication, your emotions can make you do some crazy things. Give a human a reason to fight and they will fight tooth and nail.
Be objective in how you think about the relationship. No relationship is completely perfect and there are always areas you can improve on. If you often got angry or annoyed at your partner for poor reasons and acted completely out of proportion to the alleged transgression, anger management and restraint might be something you can work on in the time between now and when you allow yourself to contact your ex again. Humans are susceptible to remembering only the things they want to remember and memory is totally fallible, meaning you might only remember the better times in the relationship and this leads to you thinking that there was nothing wrong with the relationship in the first place. This is obviously incorrect and can lead in to a thought spiraling out of control, which then inspires you to act upon this incorrect assumption and try to get your ex back before people are ready to face the facts.
Once you have both spent some time apart from each other, it is time that you start making time to meet your ex and discuss the relationship with them. They might have some harsh words for you and it is not your place to argue about these kinds of things. Eventually, you’ll both be happy and thinking properly so that you can entertain the idea of dating again. Be the person that your ex boyfriend/girlfriend was originally attracted to, not some weird facsimile of things that they expect you to be. Whilst change is good, changing too much for people when you do not want to is a very poor idea over the long run. Good luck, hopefully you won’t need to break up a second time!